Monday, December 24, 2007

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!

Reindeer food. It's a little plastic bag kids get from school filled with uncooked oatmeal and glitter. You're supposed to throw it on the lawn/sidewalk on Christmas Eve so that Santa can find you're house more easily and the reindeer get a snack.

Sounds completely innocent, right?

While I was at the store, the girl fell asleep and when I got home, I woke her up so she could throw this reindeer food outside and put a cookie for Santa by the fireplace. She quickly falls back asleep and all is well.

Once the house is quiet, I decide to grab gifts out of my car. I step outside and literally run into an opossum. I don't know who is scared more shitless. It books it into the shrubs and I was just frozen. Front door wide open.

On instinct, I ran into the house like a crazy woman for a broom and swept that crap up as quickly as I could. I feel like throwing up. It could have run into the house. I would have had a mini death over something like that.

In the future, the reindeer can STARVE.

Santa needs some tequila for her nerves...

Who know Christmas could be so hard?

Off to figure this shuffle out...

6 comments:

Simply Curious said...

Holy shit! We had a possum tonight too! I don't feed reindeer and those fuckers still attacked tonight. I froze for like 3 minutes. The second I moved it took off. Jumped off of my deck and ran like 30 MPH down the road. Those things are fast as hell.

A Girl, A Boy, and Me said...

sc - I live in a city. A very densely populated area. So in the little clump of shurbs and trees next to us there is a ZOO. We have opossum and occcasionally a skunk. They are just awful looking.

Simply Curious said...

Possums are giant ugly rats with long ugly scary snouts and tails. Shudder.

shell said...

ewww. the only time i encountered one of those was at my parent's home in glendale! it came into the backyard and tried to attack my dog! it was fierce and evil looking.

A Girl, A Boy, and Me said...

Shell - I'm sure there is a special purpose for them, I just can't figure out what the purpose is...

Shannon said...

Praise the Lord my parents did this with my kids. I have no idea what kind of critters live in their semi-rural area, but with my luck at home, I'd have gotten an armadillo.

My dad has gotten possums in his shed. They bite if you pick them up by their tails. Don't ask how he learned this. ;o)